How to win an award without trying
I didn’t even submit anything to the San Diego Press Club this year, but I took second place in the category of Daily Newspapers and Websites: Reviews.
Now if the Press Club could only spell Pat Metheny’s name and the title of his tour properly. Pat Methney? Oh yeah, don’t you know his sister: Crystal?
And if you read the story past the first four paragraphs, you’ll see that the only person on stage was Pat Metheny–sorry, no orchestra. I do mention the word, “orchestrion,” six times though.
What am I going to do with all my prize money? I’m going to buy a chimpanzee and have a tuxedo custom-sewn for him which he will have to wear all the time unless he’s sleeping. Then I will teach him to smoke a cigar. Nothing like a well-dressed chimp with a stogie to add a little class to your life.