Making Lemonade From Lemons Dept.

You’re attending a mandatory work meeting, the topic of which has absolutely no relevance to your job or daily duties. To make matters worse, someone seated directly in front of you has pants that are riding extra low, providing you an unwanted glimpse of their ass crack. What to do, what to do, what to do?

Why not take the very object which is tormenting you, and transform it into a thing of beauty? Such as this:

I was introduced to the descriptive phrase, “coin slot,” by a middle-school teacher, who told me that’s what the kids called it these days instead of “plumber’s crack,” a sign that the plumbing profession has become tidy and respectful of its customers.

One of the web sites which I use the most is www.urbandictionary.com. All of the latest slang appears there, and as I love to judiciously pepper an otherwise scholarly-sounding article with the occasional, crude vernacular turn of phrase, I find urbandictionary.com, as a writer’s tool, to be titties and beer.